Schlepping Nachas for GCSE Results!!!!


Hello my darlings!!! A hearty mazel tov to all the GCSE students and their fantastic results! All your hard work has paid off and now you can relax!


But most of all, the Jewish Mothers can relax too! Exam time is a very hard time for Jewish Mothers. Hearing about all the results and the nachas has brought back lots of memories. I can remember being on complete spilkas when my son was writing exams. I was tip-toeing around the house, talking quietly on the phone and feeding him “brain-food” in the hope that he would suddenly become Einstein. But sadly, a diet of oily fish and sardines was not his cup of tea!

Also, I had to be ‘quiet’ with the hoover and you can’t be ‘quiet with a hoover’ its impossible!! This kid plays loud music at all hours of the day and suddenly my little hoover is too loud for him!

When it comes to the work, you want to help but you also want to let him get on with it. I once asked him if I could check his Maths thinking, oh this is easy, but how wrong I was! There is NO WAY I could study this stuff again!

The ‘exam look’ is not a good look ….

You know the ‘exam look’ when you see it.  Everything goes out the window – your diet, your appearance, your sleeping pattern. You’re not exactly good date material!

The Jewish Mother’s Guide to life after GCSEs!

GCSEs are over! What next?? Well, you can overcome the paleness by going on tour to Israel – that should do the trick! You’ll make a whole new group of ‘tour friends and you’ll exchange stories about ‘tour 3’ and ‘tour 11.’

Next, you’ll be going to some music festival in the countryside where the bands don’t play real music and you live in your own schmutz for a week.

Then you’ll come home and it’s all about getting your driving  license! Studying the theory (yes, more studying!) get your learners plates and decide on a car like a Renault Clio, Mini Cooper or Volkswagen Polo.

And finally, it’s time to look at Universities so you should probably be booking a tour to Nottingham and Birmingham!

G-d Bless you my boobalahs and enjoy the Bank Holiday weekend! Hopefully you’ll have a Simcha on the Sunday night so you can actually stay up past 11pm for once in your life!


The Jewish Mother xx

Rosh Hashanah is a less than 2 weeks away!!

I thought you should know that if you want to buy some gorgeous Rosh Hashanah cards, you can order online at Davora and they’ll send them to you in the post (DUFFKA!) CLICK HERE FOR ROSH HASHANAH CARDS

My Madame Tussauds Event 

Have you booked for my Madame Tussauds Event on the 15th Sep?? If not, why not?!

Tickets are half the price of usual Madame Tussaud prices and all the earnings are being donated to Chai Cancer Care! CLICK HERE for more info!


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